I CONSTANTLY see fanwars, and stans being shitty, and cannot understand it for the life of me.
If you want people to join your community, or ever change their perspective on your fandom, you have to be inviting. Validate their experiences. Show compassion. Yelling at someone or being rude isn’t going to pique peoples interest, it’s going to keep them the fuck away from you and your community.
I just recently witnessed someone who mentioned feeling betrayed and hurt by Army stans and leaving for the SKZ fandom. It sucked reading, because there was an Army stan who started by accusing him of faking the story, and then picked his entire story apart as he elaborated and relived some insane trauma about getting death threats and doxxed and stalked by a couple Army stans.
Then this fucking loser stan had the audacity to end the conversation with “well I have never met a toxic Army, SKZ fandom is much more toxic”. Holy shit look in the mirror.
Why the hell does this person think that this is okay in the slightest? Are they TRYING to get people to hate Army?
I got into kpop very tentatively and very cautiously because I had bad experiences with getting into it. I had multiple people say “well you like music from other languages, you will LOVE this” and then I never liked the tracks. Huge genre gaps too.
I had a really good friend be insanely patient with me and got me started by saying “hey this track sounds like music you listen to, maybe you would like it!”.
They showed me a couple MV’s they liked here and there. I eventually somewhat organically found Bibi through a remix/feature of an artist I liked, and was excited cause it was the stuff my friend had shown me! Through Bibi I found Yena, and through her I found I-zone and then everything else was history.
If my friend hadnt been patient, kind, and willing to actually listen and understand what I wanted/needed, I would NOT be into kpop even half as much as I am now.
I wish all fans/stans could be like her, and not like that stan who caused someone to relive their trauma in the most dismissive and disgusting way.
submitted by /u/RegaultTheBrave
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