First of all, if this topic has been discussed to death then I’m sorry but here’s another one because I’ve been thinking way too much about this.
I keep getting recommended videos about this and watching one made me extremely sad. How do some of them succeed? (As in last/get married eventually, or alternatively break up on good terms, not get caught).
I genuinely don’t think I’ll be ever able to reconcile with the fact that there are genuinely people out there who hate the fact that these people date, or want to. I personally think “I would rather not know” falls right under crazy fan behaviour because this just means you would feel a way if you found out. And like what do you mean? You literally attend concerts with your s/o but they can’t date????
I think the strongest I’ve felt about them dating was maybe a little jealousy? Like who is that lucky person dating my bias? But I grew up in the era of girlfriend/boyfriend tags on YouTube, so I mainly fall into wanting to know “who confessed first/how did you meet” type of excitement for them rather than “how dare you”.
I can maybe understand someone who wouldn’t want to be exposed to invasive information about the couple, or have to be part of a fandom where people are asking inappropriate questions to the couples/idol in question.
Maybe this is seeing things from my perspective but I genuinely don’t see what the big deal is? How did SK even start allowing a culture that demonised this so bad? I can understand if someone was a horrible person, homewrecking, womanising, playing everyone, etc. Funny enough, the secrecy they have to keep means that all this is happening and no one will ever know because after cheating they’re on bubble making you giggle Everyone go watch HyoKey’s video on this exact experience lol–she’s a former kpop idol and she’s spilling all the tea about everything.
But genuine puppy love or something more serious, and then we go around and ask them to answer dating queries. Like are we okay? What’s so wrong about this?
From watching the one video, I tried to put myself in that situation and felt both ways about it. I’m a pretty private person and have no social media, also the busy lifestyle and consequent long-distance nature of these relationships would be fine for me.
But on the flip side…
Like I already know from exposed “scandals” that it would be atrocious, but even if we dated successfully and he was my forever partner/husband, I think it might make me miserable to never get to go out with him or have to announce to the entire world when we get married because privacy is a myth in Korea and everything is searchable. Like I’m not even trying to tell all my family about my business, and we would have to make this decision to get ahead of the exposure.
And then I factor in how I don’t want to wait until I’m deep in my thirties to be “allowed” to get married and have kids. This means we’ve been dating for years. I could’ve gotten another degree, and probably a masters and phd too in the time some of these people are dating. I don’t want my kids to have a dad who can’t keep up with a toddler or a bratty teen all because we waited until fans could “accept” him dating and now he’s a grandpa-like father.
So that makes me think, like who is dating these people? And I’m not talking about clout chasers or people who just want the experience or a hookup. I’m talking they love each other and potentially want to grow old together, or are young and delusional enough that they think they’re going to be together forever. Who are these men and women? What is their mindset? As a “practicality and values before love” kind of person, I’m wondering what amount of love can allow a person to say yes, or to pursue an idol in the first place? Aside from fellow idols and people in entertainment. The way I see it, there are so many more cons than pros to this.
Or am I just seeing this from too much of a negative perspective? Idk, guys, would you date an idol? If yes, why do you think it would work out? And how far would it work out? A few months? Years? Are yall growing old together? Is it a rookie? A veteran? Someone in between? Small company, or big company? I just want to know the mindset of someone who would willingly do this.
And I’m not saying no one should want to date them, in fact I’m trying to dismantle this system so we can have GQs Couple Quiz Kpop version. That would be so cute omg!😩
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