Disclaimer: I am writing this post as a person that has been into kpop for eleven years.
So, we all know that when it comes to idols dating, whether that be with non-idols or other idols, that they usually do not make that relationship public. And if it does somehow come out that an idol is in a relationship, it usually happens because the companies have confirmed it. Even after that, there are usually no public interactions between those idols. For years, I have seen other kpop fans express their distaste with how idol relationships are handled. The general consensus is that idols are human and should not have to hide or be ashamed of their relationships. Many fans over the years have expressed that who their idol dates is none of their business. While I would like to say that kpop fans have moved forward in how they feel about their idols dating, they are still the problem.
The biggest example that I can think of is the relationship between Dawn and Hyuna that happened some years ago. Although fans were genuinely happy for this couple, they were still crossing boundaries left and right. There were tons of fan edits, think pieces, and accounts dedicated to the Hyuna and Dawn as a couple. That is not normal behavior. Yes, I know that Hyuna and Dawn were very open about their relationship, even going as far as to appear on shows together, make music together, and post couples photos together. Still, the amount of people that were invested in their relationship was a problem. It does not matter what or how much information a person posts online about themselves or their significant other, it is not normal to be so invested in that relationship. Especially as someone who does not know them AT ALL. It’s gets worse when they broke up.
When Hyuna and Dawn broke up, there were way too many people weighing in on what they thought happened. Especially when Hyuna came out with the creepy guy from the Burning Sun Scandal. Yes, it was absolutely appalling to see that she got into a relationship with a known predator, but it was completely wrong for people to tie that back to her previous relationship with Dawn. People were genuinely upset when she was engaged to and married that guy after she was engaged to Dawn because they thought she left him for her current husband. It doesn’t matter what happened, that is no one’s business but theirs. In addition to that, there were so many people that made posts and comments about not believing that true love exists because Hyuna and Dawn broke up. Does anyone not see how crazy that sounds? Two people, that you did not know personally, broke up. All you know about them is what they shared in the media and online. You know nothing about what happened between them when the cameras were not filming. You only know what they showed you yet their breakup damaged how you thought about love??? That’s ridiculous.
There are other examples as well: Baekhyun and Taeyeon, Kai and Jennie, and Heechul and Momo.
People to this day are still talking about how it was so sad for these couples to have broken up because you could tell how much they cared for each other. How??? The only things that we got from the Baekhyun-Taeyon and Kai-Jennie relationships were blurry, grainy photos that were released by third parties. We only knew about Heechul-Momo because it was confirmed by the companies after a bunch of rumors. Besides that, there were no public interactions or content released about those couples. Yet, to this day, people still have so much to say about how heartbroken the couples were.
To wrap it up, a lot of kpop fans would like to think that they are open-minded and “free” about idol relationships but they really aren’t. A lot of them are the problem. Just because you don’t stalk your idols and their partners or take secret photos of those couples does not mean that you aren’t the problem. Becoming so invested in a relationship between two strangers and their relationship status is a problem as well.
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