I’m an American F(24) my husband is Korean (30). I apologize for my bad grammar in advance I’m dyslexic. I have written about him in the past but now he’s asking for a divorce, which is crazy because he refused to sign divorce papers when I asked him for one and threatened to sue me. I’ve already met with a lawyer and I honestly can’t afford it he wants 7.7 million for the case. My husband has been physically abusive and financially. I have pictures of it. I have hit him back but I’m defense because he will literally drag me and kick me he’s left bruises on my ribs. He’s called the cops on me in the past for trying to leave Korea, when I found out he cheated on me and had a incest porn addiction. He told them I was bipolar and violent which I am bipolar but I have never been violent and I was actively on medication and seeing a therapist. They saw my bruises but did nothing for me besides tell him he can’t keep me in Korea he cancelled my plane ticket. The American embassy has also not done much for me. I made stupid decisions of course and I’ve cursed and insulted him but it’s mainly because I am reactive to everything he says and does and it took me a long time to get to that point. My therapist said it’s called reactive abuse. Everytime I try to leave he gaslights me and makes me feel guilty or threatens to sue me. His lawyers said he’s done nothing wrong even with the illegal porn he was watching that had underaged girls. I stupidly also got pregnant and had a miscarriage 3 months and didn’t even know I was pregnant he hit me in my stomach. He’s also abused my cat. I’m in debt I have no card that works in Korea and he spends all the money on himself he literally has so much debt too. There have been days I haven’t ate because he wouldn’t feed me or give me money to go eat. I told his mom all she did was say don’t hit her. I also found on the computer we shared that he took screenshots of my personal photos of when I was naked coming out of the shower. Which I know is very illegal. I was told I am getting a huge inheritance but of course that in my future and not now. I also have about 3k in a tsp govement investments fund which he’s trying to take from me. I feel trapped his personality changed completely as soon as we were married. He told me we’d have a house and he’s financially stable. That’s why I came to Korea I was never rich but I was financially stable on my own before this now I have a 400 credit score and and lot of debt. I know my mistakes. I don’t know what to do from here. This probably isn’t relevant recently he was diagnosed with BPD. He takes no accountability he is egostical. He slept though me having an allergic reaction to crab that he fed me he knows fully well I’m allergic his excuse was he was to tired to take me or to read the label I asked him before hand if it had crab. When I went to the hospital for emergency treatment he pulled my arm back so hard my tendon and muscle are damaged I have to do physical therapy and get my arm drained he refused me medical attention I couldn’t move my arm for two months until I finally went to see a doctor. He constantly yells at me and his sister mocks me and makes fun of me. I have literally nothing to go back to when I do go to America I feel like a fool and I’m scared. I don’t speak much Korean and I have asked for help from the Korean and American government but they all have said it’s a personal issue. I mentally suffering and I previously had cptsd from childhood abuse and he has made it worse I am scared of him. I have depression and I’m not on medication because he refused to pay for it. I don’t know what to do I’m scared for my future and I have no support system both in American and Korea. I tried leaving in the past but I was a coward. All I asked him to do was take accountability I wanted to understand him I wanted to fix our relationship I did so much for him just to be called worthless.
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